Thursday, November 05, 2009

Wedding Dress Plan

So here is my wedding dress. The long version on the right. Empire waist and I love the sleeves and it has this nice little pleat for my growing baby belly. I chose a claret stretch velvet. I figured the "stretch" will fit nicely with the belly as this has back darts and boob darts.

And wow have my boobs grown, I just measured for sizing purposes...5 inches...my boobs have grown 5 inches since August. But I'm down a net total of 2 lbs from where I began. All that puking I suppose. Today was a great one too...the morning sickness combo along with a gushing bloody nose at the same time. Such a lovely sight to see in the toilet as you're dry heaving.

Anyway, I am never for going with the flow, and I blame Queen Victoria for her hideous choice of white for a wedding dress. Did you know prior to her, women just wore their best dress? Geez...and white is so not attractive on everyone. So...in other cultures they wear red, I thought why not me too?

I'm about halfway done with it right now. I love how the sleeves are coming out. So far I have not had the desire to throw it across the room...yet. I'm just worried about the zipper. Zippers and stretchy knits...I'm a wee bit scared.

Oh and I figured out the coolest wedding favor. It's my altered art version of those Hershey Bars. I love it, I'll put up pics as soon as I get a couple samples made up.

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Going to the chapel and we're.....

Gonna Get Married!!

Yep, my birthday weekend, he proposed. So...my birthday was Sept 25th, a Friday. My ex had the kids that weekend. And N wanted to take me to his hometown (where we met) for Saturday. It was lots of fun. We went to the "square" (you know those fun little downtowns in small towns?) and shopped and went to our favorite little ice cream place and antique stores, etc.

Anyway, they have this amazing old bookstore on the square that was originally an opera house. How cool is that? It has all kinds of nooks and crannies and upstairs and downstairs, so much fun to get lost in. This was where we had our first date, cuz we are both such bookworms. It's also where we had our first kiss on that date...standing in front of the physics section, both of us looking for his favorite author, Richard Feynman, and I look up at him, and his looking at me and it was magic, and we kissed and it was amazing!!

There is nothing better than getting homemade cake batter ice cream and sitting outside the storefront while he reads to me from a book we picked up there. We do this about once a month. The time before this it was raining and felt so wonderful to be outside, our table was perfectly positioned under the awning so we stayed dry. He read a Steven King story to me that was frightening about a plan to stop smoking.

So I had my suspicions (more like wishes, lol) as he was being so cuddly and kissing me all through the bookstore, but I just assumed we were book shopping and he was in a mood. We wind our way back to that same physics section, and I'm looking for a replacement copy of his favorite book by, you guessed it, Dr. Feynman, as the cover is completely ripped off and pages are coming off now, and he needs a new one. I turn around to tell him there is not one Feynman book to be had when I look at him, and he smiles and starts pulling a ring out of his pocket and gets down on one knee...in the middle of the bookstore, and asks me to be his wife. Isn't that lovely? Of course I said yes, then let him put the ring on my finger and kissed him fiercely.


Our birthdays are both in September, so I requested a sapphire ring to symbolize both of us. It has four little diamonds on either side and it looks vintage. I love it. I found this picture online. I love it so much, we've decided to use it as my wedding ring too. You can't really see in the picture the designs on the sides that make it look so beautifully vintage.


Tonight I bought his wedding ring. He wanted a sapphire too, so I got him this titanium one with a tension mount. He has already seen it online and loved it.

So as soon as I can find an wedding officiant, we are going to elope on November 20th with my kids, then have our immediate families come that night to have a private party at a restaurant. Now I'm on to make plans for a cake and some little wedding favors and elopement announcements for the rest of our families and friends.


Sigh...It is amazing how much my life has changed in a year. I'm so very happy :)

Oh we had the ultrasound for the baby about 3 weeks ago. Everything is great aside from the morning pukings. I'm currently 11 weeks 2 days. Sometime in December we'll have the next ultrasound for the sex. I'm dying to know...I have suspicions it's a girl, and last time I was dead on with Mr. E. I knew he was a boy from the get go, but this time I don't feel so sure.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Hey...

Well I think life has somewhat settled down for me to find time to blog. So many things have changed. I met the man of my dreams a few days before I quit blogging back in February. We have been inseparable ever since. This is him...and an original song he wrote:



My divorce was done and final way back in April. I moved out of my parents home. Now my love and I live together with my children. We are all very happy. I could not ask for a better guy, he fits in so well with my children and I, it's like he's been here from the beginning. We have plans to run off to Vegas in a few months to get married.

I'm almost finished with my bachelor's degree. I will "probably" graduate in the spring. Probably being the operative word because of some news down further in my post.

I was promoted and became the boss of the lab, and I've increased production and efficiency so they are very happy with me. The girl who was there before me went a little crazy and quit her job and behaved so disrespectful to me, they asked her to leave when she gave her 2 weeks' notice.

And the biggest news of all.....WE'RE HAVING A BABY!!! I'm not due til April, we just found a couple days ago. After all the infertility crap I had to go through with my ex, this surprise was absolutely wonderful. My love is thrilled, and it will be his first time being a father from the very beginning (he's already a wonderful parent to my children). Though I have to admit, I'm a tad worried....morning sickness and twinges of pain in my boobs and uterus have already started which make me wonder at only 3 weeks pregnant if I'm having more than one, lol. Both times before that didn't hit til 8 weeks.

Now the fun part....telling my boss...yikes!! And then telling my parents and the ex. We told the kids last night. They are beyond thrilled about having a new little one, and since they are going to their dad's tonight, I'm guessing I won't be the one telling him.

So hopefully I'll have some sew and shows of maternity stuff. This nausea is already forcing me into elastic waist pants, lol, and I feel like I'm wearing pajamas, so some skirts will be made this weekend....on another note...have you tried the Angry Chicken 5-minute skirt? I am totally addicted.

Friday, February 27, 2009

OMG...Wow!!

Well, well, well...I don't know what to say. Last night in the midst of studying for my biology test (which I think I did ok on this morning...), someone contacted me through my blog...someone who opened my eyes to what my ex really is. It wasn't all my imagination...I wasn't delusional...she saw it years ago and ran from him. So I think my suspicions are just now even more confirmed about what he's been doing for years....nice, just nice. Isn't it great when the first year of your marriage, your husband is already cheating with internet affairs? And me, the f'ing perfectionist that I am...wanted to fix it and kept trying for 12 years...god damn, sometimes you need to just give up and listen to your intuition...I think that's what I took away from this, my intuition is always right. I have tendencies to want to prove it wrong when it tells me something negative, now I'm much better at accepting those "stay away" vibes about people.

Anyway...still kissing a lot of toads to find my prince...I hope he shows up soon (and he might have recently). Could someone tell him to stand up and show his face, so I know who I'm waiting on, lol? It would really make this a lot easier.

Ok so this friend I spoke of earlier also mentioned Jack's Mannequin. I'm hooked...love, love, love it. I just love indie music. So here is one of my faves, Dark Blue.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

I need to face the fact that...

I am a hopeless romantic. I believe in love and meant to be and soulmates and the whole crapload of it, and I just need to quit pretending I don't, cuz i know I do. I want to believe there is that one person for everyone that makes it all magical and worth it. Whatever...Anyway, I've been singing along to this song, Wedding Dress, by Matt Nathanson all day long. I love it and wanted to share...doesn't he have a great voice? Ok...i can't keep my eyes open, going to nap for 30 minutes before I get kidlets....someone has been keeping me on the phone late at night and I haven't been sleeping much *giggle*. Met him today and he took me to lunch...sigh...I want more...

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Everything....

So in regards to Singles Awareness Day...otherwise known as Valentine's Day...I give you a wonderful love song. So yeah Lifehouse was a christian band, now they are more mainstream. But apparently THIS is their song...the one that everyone loves. It has sort of a double meaning, it can be about the christian god or it can be about a love. When I hear this song it gives me goosebumps and it feels like it's about being in love to me. It's perfect...I love it. I make up stories to songs. This song...I picture the first kiss that leads to everything. Kisses down the neck...whispers in the ear of desire and love...the quivers and chills that go up your spine as that first fire is ignited....sigh....

Monday, February 09, 2009

Stung by a wasp!!

It is kind of hard to type today...I got stung by a wasp in my biology lab today. Can you believe it? We were making giant glucose molecules and when we had finished, we were to raise our hands and the professor came over and made sure we had made it correctly. Well...I raised my hand and suddenly felt this sharp pin prick on my ring finger, then felt legs standing on my finger. Needless to say I didn't look at it, I just flicked it off as fast as possible. Then my finger started to hurt like HELL and turned purple. So I found my teacher and she took me to the lab coordinator who doctored it up with cortizone and sent me off to the nurse...so I got out my lab today. It was boring, but I would have preferred a boring lab over a very hurt and swollen finger. And when I left for the nurse, they still hadn't cornered the wasp in the classroom yet. Eeek!!!

Sunday, February 08, 2009

Cursed damn blog!!

So I have come to the conclusion that my blog is cursed. It's out to get me, or it apparently has some kind of secret voodoo doll of me stashed between its pages that it pulls out and jabs with sharp pins. If I talk about something on here, it will go to shit about 2 days later. How screwed up is that? So...I now have to keep secrets from my blog. I can't tell it exciting things or it will royally screw it up. (and totally off topic, but this blog brings out the worst in me...I want to write curse words, lol). So...wink wink nod nod...I don't have any plans for the future. I'm just gonna sit at home for the rest of my days.... :P

Thursday, February 05, 2009

Dammit....

Fuck. I don't know what else to say. I'm so annoyed with myself...well I don't know if it's myself I'm mad at or what. Let's just say I did something thinking I was doing something really enjoyable for someone and it hurt them, a lot. It was not my intent at all. I really thought it was a good thing. But they got mad, really mad. I tried to explain myself and apologized profusely, but they wouldn't listen. They forgave me but did not believe me, which I assume means I'm a liar?

They insisted that things are never done on accident, and it's only the end result that someone is sorry about, and that the only reason I did it was to get a good jab into them because I was mad at them for something else.

I feel absolutely awful and sick about it. First of all, I'm not a vindictive person. I don't try to get someone back in a hurtful way, life is too short. I'm too busy trying to apologize for whatever they are mad about. And secondly, I don't like being viewed as a liar. Damn...and I have no idea how to fix this. I'm a fixer...I have to make things better or it eats me up inside, and I don't think I can fix this one....and that is getting to me. I wish something could take my mind off it.

Monday, February 02, 2009

The Most Awesome CrossStich...Evah!!

Have you seen this?? Is this not awesome or what?? It's from Subversive Crossstitch. I want to decorate my entire house in these little gems. If my little crafting addiction would return to my nimble fingers, but alas I'm more interested in getting bite marks/hickeys from adult men...(totally another story that is so freaking embarrassing. Let's just say my mother is convinced, I'm sure by now, that I am indeed a whore).

Holy crap, I came across this wonderful little book perusing the Half Price Book store over by my daughter's dance studio. I giggled like a virginal school girl reading this...I know some of the workers were specifically walking by to see what the hell I was laughing at...one adorable one in particular, lol, cuz I couldn't shut up.

Had I not had a bazillion books in my hand, I so would have bought it along with the Stupid Sock Creatures Kit too, but alas Phillipa Gregory's The Other Queen was in the new fiction section for half price and I could not pass that sucker up as I've been looking for it, for months, lol.

Sunday, February 01, 2009

Before I forget...

I have a story to tell...

So this was the first guy I went out on a date with, who actually assumed he was picking me up. I'm not sure what it is...it's like the baggage from past relationships and marriages and kids, etc., seems to infiltrate everything and dating in your 30s is not like in college or early 20s. I think men have been morally screwed up by feminism and have no idea if chivalry is acceptable or not. I was surprised and thought it was a sweet notion since he just assumed it was the way things worked. Let me tell you a secret guys...women love chivalry...and I am sorry if there is a 0.1% of us who don't who have scared all of you into thinking we don't want that, the rest of us definitely enjoy it.

Anyway, so we were going to eat at El Fenix (so yummy...). So we were just seated and we're talking, laughing...I was having a good time. All of a sudden I hear..."Stephanie?" in an all too familiar voice. It was my childhood best friend, her kids and her parents. We are still friends, but we rarely talk. We meet once or twice a year for a get together with our familes as our mothers are good friends, and we catch up and everything, but neither one of us really work at keeping the relationship constant, lol. I think on my part it stems from her dumping me as a friend because I wasn't cool enough back in high school, lol. She wanted to be with the popular people so desperately...I was the kind of girl who didn't give a crap about popular people, so she dumped me for another girl named Stephanie (apparently 1976 was the year of the Stephanie) who had had 2 abortions before she was 14 yrs old. Quality friendship, lol.

Anyway so I know her mother told her I was getting divorced, but the look on her face when she saw I was with another man was priceless, lol. And this was a first date I was on, lol. She walks right up to him and says her name, shakes his hand, and he is a goofball and just starts playing along. The entire family looks completely uncomfortable at this point and then they disappear, lol. He and I laughed about it and then had a lovely evening.

I'm not sure what was more uncomfortable...was it the fact that I was with another man or the fact that I have gone through a complete metamorphosis since she last saw me? I used to play the part of frumpy housewife quite well. I was trapped in a miserable marriage, I wasn't happy, I didn't care because there was no reason to care. I had tried for years and then when I realized he would never want me no matter what I did, I gave up on a lot of things, myself included. Now I have hope, I'm happy, and can be the girl I really am. I'm creating my own life now. I'm girly and feminine and I've grown sophisticated in the way I present myself to the world.

I have finally grown into a woman and I like who I am now...though I'm still calling myself a girl...and don't you dare call me "ma'am," that title is reserved for 65 yr old women in polyester pants and bright red lipstick.

I have a date...tonight

This one feels like it's going to be special...it's a sort of first date...meet for coffee kinda thing. We both have kids so scheduling is rather...hmmm what's the word I'm thinking...complicated? I don't want to put a negative word, cuz we both understand that kids come first and we have to work around...hmm...is convoluted a negative word? I don't know, lol....maybe a bit of a challenge is a good way to put it. Well suffice to say, I'm excited for this one. Usually I'm nervous. But this one feels different, he intrigues me on so many levels I can't wait to see how it turns out.

On another completely different note....my daughter has discovered reading. Finally! I thought she would never love books....but she has discovered a series of books she's inhaling...Diary of a Wimpy Kid? I'm thrilled for her. I wanted her to love books like I do, but I was starting to have my doubts. Now I'm thrilled for her.

So on another note...I have some book reviews...believe or not amongst the dates from hell, I actually read books. So here goes....

This one is The Condition by Jennifer Haigh...I wrote of another of her books called Mrs. Kimble I think. Anyway, this story focuses on the middle child of a family, she has Turner's Syndrome. Turners is a genetic mutation where part of or all of one of a girl's X chromosomes is missing...it leads to a person never going through puberty and if the entire chromosome is deleted, then she could be retarded too. This girl is very smart, not retarded, just part of hers is missing. But it's basically how after her diagnosis as a 12 or 13 yr old, her family life goes to shit, and it's the story of each individual member of the family and what happens. She does fall in love and it's sweet, but the rest of the family just falls apart over her "condition." A very good read...I couldn't put it down, I finished it in a matter of days.

Right Behind You is by Gail Giles and is a teen novel. I was in Barnes and Noble and saw it in the "new teen fiction" and it looked interesting. I read the back cover and opened it up and couldn't put it down. I finished it in 2 days time. It's a rather different subject. At 9 yrs old a little boy sets fire and kills another little boy over a baseball glove. He is not a psychopath, but he wanted to destroy the other little boy's glove and as a child never imagined what would happen. So he is sent away to a mental institution for criminally deranged children and when he's 13, he is released. His family's home was burned to the ground by the community after it happened, so his father has had to change his name and move to another state. So the boy changes his name and they move again and it's the conflict of this inner turmoil from the horrible guilt he feels raging against the life he's trying to lead as a regular teenager. It's a very intriguing story about a child killer who isn't a psychopath.

I just started a new book called Tethered about a woman who is a mortician....I have a stack of books by my beside I need to devour, lol. And I'm trying to find the newest Phillipa Gregory book without paying $25, lol. I'm hoping I come across at Half Price Books soon...no luck so far.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

So I have a story to tell you....

Once upon a time there was a girl who wanted to find a boy to love her as she believed in love even after all she had experienced in life...one might even say she was unlucky in love...so she posted at an online dating site looking for him. She is the kind of girl who likes to fly by the seat of her pants and did it on a whim.

You see her problem is this...she was in the middle of a divorce from years in a loveless marriage and has 2 kids who keep her busy during the week so she doesn’t really know where to find that love of her life, and she feels bars and clubs are not the place to find it. She believes that everyone is the love of someone’s life, you just have to come upon that person like serendipity. While this might be naive on her part, it is how she feels and she doesn’t want to become cynical.

So she posted and lo and behold, several possible suitors contacted her. One in particular stood out among the rest. They could talk for literally hours without having a loss for words. The more they got to know of each other, the more it seemed they were a near perfect match for what the other was looking for. After a couple days, they met and a whirlwind romance ensued and she fell head over heels....his smile could turn her to putty. But he did not fall as she did, he only partly fell, and then held himself away from her and hurt her many times because he was selfish and fickle with his affection for her. He was in turmoil because he was also divorcing from a bad marriage and after meeting this girl he prayed to find who seemed to fit everything he wanted in a love, he realized what he wanted most in life right now was to be alone, so he let her slip through his fingers. She decided she was not a toy to be played with and told him goodbye once and for all, and they never spoke again.

She has dated a few others, but nothing that has been able to get off the ground. She wants that amazing spark of chemistry again, to feel that intensity again. And once someone feels it, it’s like a drug you keep searching to find again.

And now we come to the present day. Her life has changed much since then; the divorce is almost finished up and she knows more what she wants out of life. She has a wonderful job working for a nonprofit organization and she is going to school to make a life better for herself and her children.

But she keeps coming back in her thoughts to finding that love. She wants someone to share her life with, to grow old with, to love and be loved, someone who the mere thought of gives her butterflies every single time. She wants someone who isn’t perfect by any means, but just right for her -- who wants the same things out of life as she does. She wants someone who loves cuddling and snuggling and touching and holding hands and kissing like her, who thinks these things are important.

She wants someone who loves to wander through bookstores with her. She wants someone who loves learning, who finds continuous knowledge important and someone who loves discussing and debating these things and who enjoys playing board games and having fun doing it. She wants someone who will put her as a priority and never dream of telling her to go home at 4 in the morning because he wants to be alone. She wants someone who is not scared of children, who might even have his own and definitely wants at least one or two more in the future if this turned into forever. She wants someone who loves movies and music and reading and to share these things with someone else as much as she does. She wants someone who is not into religion, as she is an atheist and eventually religion can divide when it comes to future children.

To tell you a little about her....her secret desires are to be a writer and to learn to play the guitar. She is a strong woman who feels things deeply, never mediocre, and she is passionate about many things and sometime you will see a fire spark within her when deep in a discussion about something she loves. She is 32 yrs old and short at 5’2, and she has short red hair streaked in blonde (though underneath it all, she is an actual blonde). She has eyes the color of the deep of the ocean and a great smile and she loves to laugh. She is curvy with a few extra pounds, but she works out and eats healthy and she carries herself well. She’s a happy person, sees the world as an optimist and can’t help but believe in true love. She loves to create and design altered art, and she blogs regularly. She has been told many times she has a sexiness about her that makes men notice her...though in reality, she thinks she’s a total dork.

She’s kind of crazy in that she loves to sing along in the car to her iPod and the radio, and she makes up stories about the songs she hears. She loves lyrics, they make her feel things deeply. Her favorites are Jason Mraz, Joshua Radin, John Mayer, Iron and Wine, the Weepies, Erin McCarley, Ingrid Michaelson, and other acoustic singer songwriters. She misses having someone to see live music with together.

She wants a guy who is taller than her, who is in his 30s, can still be a big kid and be funny and sarcastic with a dry wit but can also be sweet and romantic....And most of all, she wants someone ready for a long term relationship who is just as passionate as she is. He doesn’t have to be perfect, as she likes a guy with meat on his bones, but he knows what he wants and is sure of himself, and wants her as much as she wants him.

So the one question is.....are you him? Come find her....she’s waiting.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

For the Etsy and handmade children's items out there....please read

As of February 10th, a law will be inacted to prevent lead paint getting into children's toys, which is a good thing. However, this will make it very expensive for Etsy sellers, small at-home-crafters and artisans and the likes because it will require everyone to have a sample tested of each item to the tune of $400-$4000. Since most of us can't afford this, it will mean many will go out of business. All that is needed is an easy fix with a simple amendment much like the FDA uses with small producers.

So if you could, please go to the Handmade Toy Alliance. It will explain this more in detail, and you will find a sample letter to send to your congressman and senator as well as a petition to sign. Thanks!

Friday, January 09, 2009

Can you see me dancing like an idiot?

Yep that's me, dancing out to The Killers Mr Brightside. Wanna know why?? Cuz I have a NEW JOB!!!!!! And it's like a dream job for me. I found it on craigslist...you really can find anything there...I have a new love interest and a job all from craigslist...how cool is that? Go to craigslist...find a life...that should be their slogan I think.

So anyway...I have refused to talk about this job on here because I've come to the conclusion that my blog is a jinx. If I talk about something on here before it officially happens...I can be rest assured with about 99.9% accuracy, it will not happen the way I want it too, lol. But whatever...back to my lovely job.

Ok my new job combines my two loves. Y'all know I'm going back to school for medical technology, right? Didn't I talk about that? I swear I did, but what the hell, I'll explain it again. I'm going to school for medical technology which is a bachelors degree for working in a lab...so I get the medical part without dealing with patients (as I learned in nursing school, I don't like patients, lol). Now my loves are working a lab and breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is my passion in life...I want to educate the western world that formula is not the way to go...but I digress.

Ok now my job...so I am going to be in charge of the pasteurization lab for the Mother's Milk Bank of North Texas. How cool is that? It's part time only on T/Th so I can go to school MWF, but you have no idea how my eyes lit up when I saw this job offer...I had to make it mine. I have always wanted to work with breastfeeding somehow, and now I am. I didn't really want to be a lactation consultant and didn't see a way to work in the breastfeeding world otherwise, so I'm positively thrilled I found this job. They said they would call me by next Wednesday, but this morning I got the call. She loved how passionate I was about breastfeeding, no other job applicant was a breastfeeder....there were people with master's degrees she turned down because of my passion for nursing -- she wanted someone who loved it as much as she did. And she's thinking of letting me even do baby fairs since I have that fire in me, in addition to my job duties. And the other great thing is she basically told me I can give myself whatever title I want for my resume when it's time for me to move on after I graduate from school with my lab degree.

So yay me!!! I'm so excited. Going out to dinner tonight to celebrate...yummy mexican I think.

And just for kicks, here's the song I'm dancing too, lol.

Thursday, January 08, 2009

Some new music

I know I'm so boring with the lack of craftiness this past year...I'm getting back into it, I swear. But for now...I've discovered new music I wanna share:

You Had Me at Hello - A Day to Remember - love love this song, it's so perfect for a certain situation, lol. I love to discover songs that fit something so right, weird I know.



Your Guardian Angel - Red Jumpsuit Apparatus - I love these guys. I came across the song, it's somewhat old, but it would be lovely to have someone feel that way about you, wouldn't it?

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Sam

if you ever read my blog, email me. stephanickety at yahoo . I think about you...and I like to know what happened.